CSI Scranton
by StrawberryPajamas
Summary: Slightly AU-ish script from Season 3. Pam's got a boyfriend, and Jim is jealous. Who could it be? Jim and Dwight team up to investigate. now complete
1. Chapter 1

**The Office**

**CSI Scranton**

**Cold Opening**

_(Camera pans in on Michael putting potted plants on everybody's desks. He practically throws one at Meredith, who looks annoyed. He puts one under Creed's desk and walks away. Creed stares after him, then at the plant.)_

_(Pans in on Michael in the kitchen pulling an unopened package of bottled water out of the fridge and dumping the whole thing into a recycling bin.)_

_(TH) _Pam: Yesterday, Michael found out what global warming was. _(gives the camera a look)_ So he's been taking a few precautions. Apparently, before all this he thought global warming was just another name for International Beach Day.

_(Pans in on Michael putting a sign on the copier saying 'Save the Trees'. He turns and gives the camera a thumbs up as Kevin walks up.)_

Kevin: Michael, what's going on?

Michael _(angry)_: Hey, how many copies are you making?

Kevin _(startled)_: N-None... I was just...

Michael _(relieved)_: Good man, Kev. Good man.

_(He claps Kevin on the shoulder and walks away. Kevin just stares after him.)_

_(VO) _Michael: I never realized how fulfilling it is to help the environment I live in! I mean, I always knew this economy was in the crapper, but I love how wonderful it feels to work for this craphole. I believe it is my duty, and privilege, to un-crap this world.

_(Jim and Karen are in the break room, eating lunch on Styrofoam plates. Michael walks in and gathers up their plates and cups and dumps them in his recycling bin.) _

Jim: Michael, what are you doing?

Michael: I am saving the world, Jim. One lunch plate at a time.

Karen: You know, Styrofoam isn't recyclable.

Michael: Yeah, that's exactly what those jerks in the government want you to think...

_(walks out. Jim and Karen just look at each other.)_

Jim: National conspiracies: What are you going to do?

_(Jim smiles, and Karen elbows him in the ribs, smirking)_

**End Cold Opening**

**Theme Song**

*******

**Now, on with the show...**

_(TH) _Michael _(excited)_: Today is going to be an amazing day. I have recently discovered an amazing new show and I have decided I would like to share it with the entire office! It's Movie Monday today, so I could play it on DVD for them. Because, everyone loves to hear about a new show: something they know nothing about--

Dwight: No, that is a terrible idea.

_(Camera pans out, revealing Dwight leaning on the cabinet behind Michael, sneering)_

Michael: No, Dwight. This is a great idea. The show is amazing...

Dwight: If there is anything that people hate, it would be having something shoved down their throats. It's a complete turnoff.

Michael _(turning around to face Dwight)_: Why do you always have to do that? Why must you always rain on my yard sale?? I have this great idea and you just have to stomp all over it! God...!

_(Gets up and stalks out of the room. Dwight watches him leave, unfazed.)_

_*****************************_

_(Pam strolls into the office to start her workday. She yawns slightly as she hangs up her coat and purse and walks around her desk. The camera notices there is a fresh bouquet of flowers sitting on the counter. Pam's eyes light up and she beams as she reads the note attached. Jim glances over from his desk. He gets up and walks up to her.)_

Jim: Hey Pam. What you got there?

Pam _(embarrassed)_: Oh, um... nothing

_(she quickly hides the note, and Jim looks suspicious)_

Jim: Something you not telling me, Beesly?

_(he tries to sound lighthearted, but is obviously a little hurt. Pam glances at her shoes)_

Pam: Someone just sent me flowers. That's it, no big deal.

_(Jim was about to say something when Phyllis walks up)_

Phyllis: Hey Pam. _(noticing the flowers) _Ooh, you got something else from him?

Pam _(beaming)_: Yeah, he sent flowers today.

Phyllis: Oh, they're beautiful! Is he taking you somewhere tonight?

_(Jim just stands there, in shock. Pam has a boyfriend?? He couldn't believe it. He cuts in)_

Jim: Wait, Pam... You have a boyfriend?

_(Pam looks up at him with worried eyes. She bites her bottom lip and nods. Jim is silent; just staring at her in surprise.)_

Phyllis: Uh... I should go.

_(Phyllis walks away, uncomfortable. Jim clears his throat.)_

Jim: Wow, that's... great! I'm happy for you.

Pam _(quietly)_: Thanks

_(short silence)_

Jim: So, um... wh-what's his name?

Pam _(quickly)_: I should really get to work.

_(Pam sits down in her chair and turns on the computer. The phone suddenly rings, and she gratefully answers it.)_

Pam: Dunder-Mifflin, this is Pam.

_(Jim looks at her for a second before walking back to his desk, looking a little sad.)_

_(TH) _Jim: So, apparently, Pam has a boyfriend. I'm happy for her. She's been kind've sad for a time and... I want her to be happy _(his eyes drift away from the camera for a second). _Karen and I are great by the way.

_(TH) _Karen: Yeah, I heard Pam's got a boyfriend, which I think is great. She's a pretty mopey person, I've noticed, so I think a relationship is good for her. Jim's a little awkward with the subject, but he's a guy. _(shrugs) _What are you gonna do?

_(TH) _Pam _(trying to hide a pleased smile)_: Yeah, uh... I'm seeing someone. It started like a month ago. He's really sweet and... I like him a lot. _(her smile is very evident now)_ We've been doing great. I don't, exactly, feel comfortable mentioning names... _(her smile fades slightly) _because... well some people, in this office, might not feel comfortable with me mentioning I am romantically involved with someone... else. _(she looks a little uncomfortable) _I probably shouldn't talk about it anymore.

_(Camera pans in to see Kelly, Meredith, Phyllis and Pam fawning over the flowers by reception. Camera looks over at Jim, who is staring sadly in their direction. Karen is oblivious)_

_**End Scene 1**_

*****************************

_(Michael walks out of his office and into the main office area, giving an excited glance in the direction of the camera)_

Michael: Everybody, can I have your attention? Its time for Movie Monday, so let's all head on into the conference room, please...

_(Everyone looks apprehensive)_

Oscar: Michael, we really shouldn't. Last time, we all got in trouble with Jan.

Phyllis: Yeah, we could get suspended. Or worse...

Angela: I still don't approve of this non-work related weekly tradition. It's offensive!

_(Everybody starts talking at once, and Michael is getting frustrated)_

Michael: Look! All I'm asking is that you take a tiny little hour of your life, and spend it watching a totally awesome new show I just discovered! Okay?

Andy: What show?

Michael: That's a surprise.

Stanley: How do you expect us to-

Michael _(interrupting)_: I just do! Okay, look, I found out about this new show, that none of you have probably never heard of before, one that's totally boss, and one I really want to share with you all! Ipromise you'll love it. Just please, everyone come in the conference room, now.

_(Everyone hesitantly files into the indicated room, even Angela)_

_(TH- elevators) _Jim: I, personally, have my money on Varsity Blues. But, who knows? Maybe he'll surprise us all with another Entourage._ (gives the camera a Jim-look)_

_(Everyone sits down in a chair. Jim comes in last and sits next to Karen. He quickly glances at Pam, who's sitting to the side between Ryan and Creed. Pam ignores him, looking only at Michael)_

Michael: Okay, everyone... prepare to be amazed!

_(Kevin turns off the lights, and Michael clicks on the TV. The CSI theme song starts to play, and everybody lets out a collective moan.)_

Kevin: Really Michael? This was your amazing show that you swore none of us have ever seen??

Kelly: Yeah, _everyone_ has seen this show before.

Michael _(defensive)_: Not Season 1!

Oscar: Yeah, I'm pretty sure they have.

Stanley: I'm done here...

_(Stanley gets up, and everyone files out of the conference room after him, grumbling about time-wasters.)_

Michael: Come on guys! Where is your love of quality television?! Wouldn't you rather be watching this show than actually work?? Guys...?

_(Everyone is gone now, and the room is silent and dark. Michael pauses the show, glances down at his shoes, and sighs. He then looks up and jumps. Camera turns to see Dwight still in his seat, staring avidly at the TV set, notepad in hand.)_

Michael: GOD! Jeez... Dwight. Why did you have to scare me like that?

Dwight: I would like to watch the show Michael.

Michael _(a little surprised)_: Really?

_(Dwight nods fiercely)_

Michael: Weren't you against showing this to the entire office though?

Dwight: Yes, to the office. But they're all gone now, and now its just me. I prefer it this way, and I promise I will watch this show with all the heart and passion you watch it with.

Michael _(smiling slightly)_: Okay then... well... Enjoy!

_(Dwight nods again, and Michael presses play. As the scene opens, Michael turns around and begins to head out the door.)_

Dwight: Wait, aren't you staying?

Michael: No, I have work to do. Plus I've seen it all, so I don't really care...

Dwight: Oh, okay

_(He turns back to the TV, and Michael leaves, closing the door behind him.)_

_(TH- dark conference room with CSI playing in the background) _Dwight: Yes, I plan on watching every episode of this television series. I am dedicated to making Michael happy, and also knowledge of this show will help me out with my investigation skills. Someone has been stealing my beets, and this time: I don't it's Mose. _(gives the camera a glare)_

_(Camera pans out of the conference room window to see Dwight staring fiercely at the TV screen, taking notes)_

_**End Scene 2**_

_****************************** _

_(Kelly walks from the kitchen to the main office area. She hesitantly approaches Ryan, who's typing away at his computer.)_

Kelly: Hey Ryan.

_(Ryan looks up from his work unsmilingly)_

Kelly: Look, about last night... I don't think you were thinking properly. You said some things that you probably didn't mean, and I forgive you for it. You might have been hypoglycemic or something, I don't know, but I just wanted to let you know that we're totally cool now and that I'll be coming over at seven o'clock tonight. Okay?

_(Kelly smiles at him, and turns around to leave. Ryan's passive face is replaced with a look of exasperation. He looks up at the camera.)_

_(TH) _Ryan: Last night I tried, for the twelfth time, to break up with Kelly. The first few times I tried to tell her lightly, but she thought I was asking to be her boyfriend _and _her friend _(gives the camera a look)_. Then I tried being straightforward with her, but she seemed absolutely convinced I was sleepwalking because, coincidentally, I would always break up with her at night. Yesterday, I told her straightforward I didn't want to hang out anymore. And it was still light out, for the record. _(Looks down and shakes his head morosely) _Now how am I supposed prove I'm not hypoglycemic?

_(Camera is by Ryan's desk, looking out to the copier. It focuses in on Kelly standing by the the copier, looking over at Ryan and waving happily. Camera then focuses on Ryan, who just sighs and looks down, shuffling some papers around on his desk.)_

***

_(Camera pans in on Jim and Dwight sitting alone in their desk clump. They are working silently when a giggle can be heard from reception. Jim turns around to see Pam looking at her computer screen and smiling at an email she received. Even from the distance he could see little hearts framing the e-card on her computer and Pam's blushing, smiling face peeking over her desk. Jim turns back around, his expression stony.)_

Dwight _(looking up at Pam, grumbling)_: Completely unprofessional...

Jim _(looking carefully down)_: Tell me about it.

Dwight _(now looking at Jim, sneering)_: Oh, please! Everyone here knows you got the hots for Pam. No need to pretend you actually care about the policies this company upholds.

_(Karen is sitting a few feet away, and Jim quickly tries shushing Dwight)_

Jim: Dude, seriously: shut up! Karen's right there. And besides, you shouldn't talk about things you don't understand...

Dwight _(looking back down at his computer)_: You don't think I don't understand? With you sitting right there, day-in day-out, sniveling over the mousy receptionist? My God, it gets annoying. I'm surprised you haven't just ended this madness by now and put a shotgun to your head.

_(Jim looks at Dwight, then at the camera, a little nauseated)_

Dwight _(cont.)_: Now, don't bother me. I'm trying to do something...

_(Jim watches Dwight type something on the computer slowly with only his pointer fingers. Jim stares at him for a moment, gives the camera a look, and glances back at Dwight.)_

Jim: What are you doing?

Dwight: If you really want to know, I am doing a wikipedia search of all the seasons of CSI.

Jim _(mildly)_: Obviously

Dwight: It's for Michael. He loves the show, and I said I would find out more about it.

Jim: So you would be as up to date on it as he is?

Dwight: Precisely

Jim _(smugly)_: Ah, Dwight... you and your suck-up ways. I have missed them so.

Dwight _(angrily)_: Quiet, you! I'm going to get in enough trouble with this as it is.

Jim _(interested)_: Really? How so?

Dwight _(leaning forward and lowering his voice, forcing Jim to lean in closer to hear)_: I told Michael I would _watch_ the show. And I'm just searching it on the Internet.

_(Jim looks amused when he sits back down, thinking Dwight was kidding. But as he sees the look of utter guilt on Dwight's face, he quickly pulls a disappointed grimace, shaking his head)_

Jim: Aw, Dwight... how could you?

_(Dwight buries his face in his knuckles)_

Dwight _(sorrowful)_: I know... I'm terrible. I just don't have _time_ to watch such a show! And... _(his head suddenly snaps up to look at Jim with a crazy expression on his face) _Please don't tell Michael! I'll do anything, just _please_ don't tell Michael!

Jim _(leaning back in his chair, enjoying this)_: Oh, I don't know Dwight... what are you going to do for me?

Dwight: _Anything!_ Just please... _(he glances at Michael's office with unease)_

_(Jim pretends to think for a second, wondering what favor Dwight could owe him. Pam suddenly giggles from behind him again, and Jim's joking demeanor fades slightly. He looks down at his keyboard, in thought.)_

Jim _(suddenly serious)_: There is one thing you could do for me.

Dwight _(with fierce determination)_: What is it?

Jim _(glancing in Pam's direction before turning back to Dwight and lowering his voice)_: You could help me find out who Pam's secret boyfriend is.

_(Dwight stares at him for moment, stands up, then walks around his desk and kneels before Jim. Jim looks highly uncomfortable)_

Dwight: And help you I shall. In return, you will not tell Michael I am cheating on finding out my CSI information. Agreed?

_(He holds out his hand for Jim to shake. Jim hesitantly does so. Dwight then nods, stands up, and walks back over to his desk.)_

_(TH) _Jim: Yes, Dwight is helping me find out who Pam's boyfriend is. Its just... she won't tell me. And even though I didn't really want to try to find out this way... _(looks down and shakes his head) _Well, by that I mean I didn't want to avoid talking with her at all costs, have Dwight helping me out, and him almost proposing to me in front of the whole office. _(his eyes drift away from the camera for a second) _That really wouldn't have helped my causes.

_(Camera pans in on Jim working at his desk. He looks up at something off screen, and knits his eyebrows. Camera looks over at Dwight, who is giving Jim a very obvious wink and nod. Jim looks up at the camera with a worried expression.)_

_**End Scene 3**_

_**~To Be Continued~**_


	2. Chapter 2

**The Office**

**CSI Scranton-- Part 2**

_(Michael is walking out of his office and peers casually into the dark, empty conference room. He looks confused as he turns toward Dwight's desk, which is also empty.)_

Michael: Hey, has anyone seen Dwight?

Phyllis: No. Why?

Michael: He's supposed to be watching CSI in the conference room right now, but he's not there.

Jim _(quickly interrupting)_: --Uh, I think he's on a sales call.

Michael _(interested)_: Oh, really?

_(Other camera zooms in from behind break room blinds to see Dwight in the deserted annex discreetly looking through Toby's files. He checks around for anyone coming as he pulls out a folder and pages through it.)_

_(Back to Jim and Michael's conversation)_

Michael _(cont.)_: I didn't know he had one scheduled for today.

Jim _(suddenly nervous)_: Oh, uh, that's cause... um... it's kind've a last-minute deal, y'know?

Michael: Okay, that's fine. As long as he has his ass back in the conference room by the time he gets back. I'm not paying him to go on sales calls all day...

_(walks back into his office. Jim gives a relieved look to the camera)_

_***_

_(Later, Jim and Dwight are in the kitchen, huddled at the table and trying to hide the file from view. Jim's just looking around nervously.)_

Jim: This is the dumbest thing we've ever done.

_(He spots the camera peeking in from behind the blinds, and gives an exasperated sigh.)_

Jim _(anxiously to Dwight)_: Can we please hurry this up?

Dwight: Would you tell a police man to hurry up an investigation? No, you would want him to comb through every detail until he finds the answer he's looking for!

Jim: Okay, well then could you _comb _a little faster??

_(Dwight scowls and turns back to the papers on the table. Jim finally takes a look at the file.)_

Jim: What is this exactly?

Dwight: Pam's personal records

Jim _(looking up at Dwight, horrified)_: What?! You swiped her _personal file_?!?

Dwight _(incredulous)_: Well, what were you expecting?

Jim: For some mail records or emails that may indicate who's contacting her. Not for you to take something that's in a _locked _filing cabinet for a reason!

Dwight _(indignant)_: It might be worth it, if we find out who the mystery guy is!

Jim _(swiping the folder from Dwight's grasp)_: Not only is this going beyond ethical limits, it is completely irrelevant! How are we supposed to find out who this guy is by going through her insurance policies and doctor bills?

Dwight _(defensively)_: It might be a clue!

Jim _(with finality)_: No.

_(He gets up and begins to walk out of the kitchen toward his desk.)_

Dwight _(calling after him)_: Well, what are we supposed to do now?

Jim _(still walking away)_: Figure out Plan B.

_(He leaves. Dwight stares at the door in mild surprise.) _

_***_

_(Ryan is in the annex and walking toward Kelly, who's working away at her desk)_

Ryan: Kelly?

_(Kelly looks up, and grins hugely, even though Ryan looks like someone had just died. He leans on the desk across from her.)_

Kelly: Hi Ryan.

Ryan: We need to talk.

Kelly _(curious)_: Yeah?

Ryan: You and I are done.

Kelly _(pauses for a second, then giggles)_: What?

Ryan _(defiant)_: I'm serious: You and I are through.

Kelly _(turning back to her computer)_: Mmm-hmm. Sure.

Ryan: What, you think I'm kidding?

_(Kelly just hums happily to herself as she clicks on an online quiz to take)_

Ryan: Kelly, are you even listening to me?

Kelly: Of course.

Ryan: So why aren't you upset?

Kelly: 'Cause you don't mean it.

Ryan: No Kelly, I'm not bluffing! I'm serious...

Kelly: But are we still on for tonight?

Ryan: No! That's not--

_(Kelly's phone suddenly rings, and she picks it up)_

Kelly: Dunder-Mifflin Customer Service, this is Kelly.

_(Kelly smiles at Ryan as she's talking to the person on the other line. Ryan gives an annoyed grunt and stalks out of the annex. He stops in front of the camera, glancing back at Kelly.)_

Ryan: It can't be stopped.

_(shakes his head and continues walking through the kitchen door. Camera turns to see Kelly still happily chatting with the customer on the phone)_

_**End Scene 4**_

_***************************_

_(Camera pans in on Jim working silently at his desk. A paper clip suddenly flies through the air and hits him square on the forehead. Jim clenches his jaw but keeps on working. A few seconds later another paper clip hits Jim on the nose. He ignores it again, but is looking even more annoyed. Suddenly, about six or seven paper clips fly through the air and shower Jim's head and desk. He finally throws down his pen and glares at Dwight.)_

Dwight: Psst!

Jim _(whispering fiercely)_: What?!

_(Dwight mouths the word "NOW!" and nods toward the break room. Jim presses his lips together, nods, and gets up, heading toward the indicated room. He's suppressing an eyeroll.)_

_(Camera pans in on Karen sitting in the break room and reading a magazine while munching on salt and vinegar chips. Jim walks in and she looks up, smiling.)_

Karen: Hey, you.

Jim: Hey.

_(He sits down across from her and Karen sets down her magazine.)_

Jim _(cont.)_: How's your day been?

Karen: Pretty good. Better than yesterday, but not as good as tomorrow's gonna be.

_(Jim chuckles and Karen smirks, biting down on another chip. Jim takes a deep breath and continues)_

Jim: So, have you heard that Pam has a boyfriend now?

Karen _(nodding)_: Yeah, I heard about that. I'm really glad, she deserves to be happy.

Jim _(scratching the back of his neck)_: ...Yeah

Karen _(questioningly)_: What makes you bring it up?

Jim: Well, I was thinking you could bring her to lunch... as a little "Congratulations" girl-type lunch thing.

Karen _(smiling)_: Yeah, that sounds like a great idea! But since when did you care so much about Pam?

Jim _(suddenly uncomfortable)_: Well... I guess, cause, I've known her for a long time and... she was stuck in that bad relationship with Roy for so long... and like you said, she deserves to be happy. She's really nice and kind and... talented, and... _(he gives a small, awkward cough)_ it's about time she found someone... special, y'know?

_(Karen looks touched at Jim's thoughtfulness, and sets her hand over his, rubbing it with her thumb.)_

Karen: That's really sweet of you Jim. Pam's lucky to have you as a friend. I'll ask her later if she would like to come, kay?

_(Karen smiles before gathering her stuff and walking out the door. Jim just sits at the table for a minute, staring off into space, before getting up and meandering out of the room after his girlfriend)_

**_End Scene 5_**

_**************************_

_(Dwight is coming out of the kitchen and heading toward his desk. Michael steps out of his office and stands in front of him, hands on his hips. Dwight freezes, looking terrified)_

Michael _(suspiciously)_: Hello... Dwight.

Dwight _(trying to hide nervousness)_: Michael

_(Michael gives what he thinks is a coy look to the camera)_

_(TH) _Michael: Dwight hasn't been in the conference room watching the show at all today, and I know it. He said he was going to, but he lied. He is being a liar to me, and now he must pay. How? Well-- let's just say he should be prepared to get wet. _(grins creepily at the camera before the smile slides off his face and he glances down, mumbling)..._ that's not appropriate...

_(Back to Michael and Dwight's conversation)_

Michael: Haven't seen you in the conference room lately.

Dwight _(gulping)_: Oh, really? Well, I've been in there a lot today... watching... the show.

Michael: Huh... okay. Well then, I assume you at least got through the pilot?

Dwight _(earnestly)_: Yeah, oh yeah, I'm _way_ past that episode...

Michael: Yeah? How does that one end again?

_(Dwight suddenly looks nervous. He clears his throat and opens his mouth wordlessly when Jim suddenly appears at his shoulder.)_

Jim: Oh, yeah! Dwight was just telling me how much he enjoyed watching that episode, weren't you Dwight?

Dwight _(blinking)_: Uh... yeah

Michael _(surprised)_: Really?

Jim _(earnestly)_: Oh, definitely! He was going on and on about how it ended; how amazingly good it was. He wouldn't shut up about it, talking about it like he was _actually there_. I, personally, admire such dedication to a fictional TV show.

Michael _(satisfied)_: Well, then... I'm sorry for doubting you Dwight. Keep up the good work!

_(He smiles proudly and walks back into his office. Both Dwight and Jim sigh with relief, still standing in front of the conference room door.)_

Dwight _(turning to Jim)_: I didn't need you to save me, you know.

Jim: Well, either way, you can repay me by helping me out with this situation.

Dwight _(looking around quickly and leaning in close, talking quietly)_: Has Plan B been put into motion yet?

Jim _(mumbling)_: Yeah... should be any minute now.

_(Suddenly, Karen gets up from her desk and starts walking up to Pam's, giving Jim and sweet smile as she passes. Jim has a miserable expression on his face, and Dwight watches Karen move up to talk to Pam.)_

Dwight _(impressed)_: You know, I have to hand it to you: this plan is rather genius. I never would have thought of it.

_(Jim ignores the compliment and walks toward his desk and sits down in his chair. He's obviously starting to feel bad.)_

_***_

Karen: Hey Pam.

Pam _(smiling)_: Hey Karen.

Karen: Listen, have you had lunch yet?

_(Pam just has a pleasantly surprised look on her face as Jim watches them, a rather guilty look on his face.)_

_***_

_(Camera pans in the break room window where Ryan and Kelly are having a heated argument. Ryan shouts something, unheard by the camera, and throws up his hands in frustration. Kelly seems to have finally gotten the message, and is looking devestated. Tears and mascara are running down her face as she's clutching Ryan's arm in earnest. She's saying something, when Ryan interrupts her, crossing his arms. Kelly, giving up, sinks into a chair and sobs to herself. Ryan merely stands there for a minute, looking down, and finally turns and walks out of the room.)_

_***_

_(Camera is in the conference room and looking out the window at the parking lot where, far below, Pam and Karen are walking to Karen's car and talking. Camera turns around and faces the open door toward Jim and Dwight.)_

Dwight: Ready?

Jim _(looking troubled)_: I really don't know Dwight.

Dwight _(gritting his teeth)_: Dammit Jim, we can't flake out now! We already got this far...

Jim:... And we can stop so we don't have to intrude on Pam's personal property! What if she found out??

Dwight: She doesn't _have_ to find out.

Jim _(stubbornly)_: I'm sorry, but no.

_(He turns back to his computer, but Dwight walks around his desk and kneels in front of Jim again, much like how he did earlier that day.)_

Dwight: We are not going to be stealing any of her personal mementos, we will not be trying to find out her social security number, and we will not be reading her email. We are just looking for a tiny, little fact that is, incidentally, behind that desk of hers. If you want to find out that fact, it will only take up a moment of our time to search her things and come up with it. Will you not take advantage of this moment?

_(Dwight looks at Jim in the eye, and Jim just stares at him, surprised by his improptu speech. Jim finally sighs, defeated.)_

Jim: Okay.

***

_(Camera is in the lobby and looking outside of the building to the parking lot, where Karen and Pam are still standing outside and talking.)_

_***_

_(Jim and Dwight are behind Pam's desk. Dwight is looking through her papers and Jim is clicking onto her IM window.)_

Jim _(suddenly)_: I've got something!

_(Dwight looks around at what Jim is referring to.)_

Jim _(pointing at the screen)_: She's been conversing with someone called "dundermifflinco.-at-hotmail-dot-com". And from the looks of it, they're pretty intimate...

Dwight _(grumbling)_: But we still don't know his name! That doesn't help us.

Jim _(shaking his head and standing up straighter)_: No, but it does.

_(Dwight straightens up to and looks suspiciously at Jim.)_

_***_

_(As Pam and Karen are talking in the parking lot, Ryan suddenly pops out from behind the building, spots the two women, waves, and jogs up to them, grinning. Pam and Karen wave back, and Pam asks him something when he reaches them. He shakes his head and says something, looking upset, and Pam rubs his arm sympathetically. Ryan smiles at her. He quickly checks his watch and points back to the building. Pam nods and they peck each other on the cheek before he turns and runs back upstairs. Karen is grinning at Pam from ear to ear.)_

_***_

_(VO)_Jim: We know for sure she's dating someone from this office.

Dwight: _(nodding)_: Yes... we're one step closer to finding out who this mystery guy is.

**_End Scene 6_**

_**~To Be Continued~**_


	3. Chapter 3

**The Office**

**CSI Scranton-- Part 3**

_(The camera pans in on Michael walking through the main office area, glancing over at Dwight and giving him a thumbs up. Zooms in to show that Dwight has a look of utter guilt on his face, going unnoticed by Michael.)_

_(VO)_Michael: Yes, I am incredibly proud of Dwight. He has stuck with this whole CSI thing and I'm, well... I'm proud of him. _(smiles at the camera) _He deserves some recognition for the dedication he has shown to this company and to me, so I have decided to do a little something special for everyone in the office. _(smiles eagerly)_

_(Camera is by Dwight, who's working diligently at his desk.)_

Michael _(from his office)_: Dwight!

_(Dwight obediantly shoots up and sprints to Michael's office. He stops in front of his desk.)_

Dwight: Yes, Michael, what is it? Is it your blood sugar again?

Michael: No Dwight. Please, have a seat.

_(Dwight plants himself in a chair.)_

Michael _(cont.)_: Look, Dwight...

Dwight: Oh God, is it Carol? Did you tap her phone and overhear her dealing drugs with inter-city cops?

Michael: What...!? No. No, I... look Dwight, I brought you in here to tell you how proud of you I am for sticking with my TV show.

Dwight _(suddenly uneasy)_: Oh, really?

Michael: Yes, and to honor your dedication to the show I have planned a special treat for the entire office, starting at around four p.m.

Dwight _(quickly)_: Michael, you really don't have to--

Michael _(cutting in)_: No, I want to. You deserve it, for all the effort you're putting in just to make me happy _(smiles at a noticeably guilt-ridden Dwight)._

Dwight _(getting up to leave)_: Okay well, if that's it... _(he obviously wants to get out as soon as possible)_

Michael: Yes. _(Suddenly jokingly)_ And it's a secret, so don't spoil it for anyone...!

Dwight _(mock jokingly)_: Oh I won't! _(gives a knowing look to the camera before standing up and walking away.)_

_**End Scene 7**_

* * *

_(Pam is working quietly by her desk when the camera practically zeroes on her. It stays on her like that for a few seconds before she finally notices. She looks up, a little unnerved.)_

Pam _(nervously)_: What?

_(Camera spins around and lands on Ryan, who's working at his desk and not noticing he was being watched. Camera spins back around, landing on Pam. She has a look of frozen shock on her face when she realizes what the camera people know.)_

_*** _

_(TH- with Ryan)_Pam _(unconviningly)_: Um... mind if I ask why you brought us both in here? I mean, not that it matters, but--

_(She pauses, and looks over at Ryan. He chuckles nervously, scratching the back of his neck.)_

_(TH)_Ryan _(mumbling, so only Pam can hear)_: Pam, I think they know...

_(TH)_Pam _(smiling softly)_: Yeah.

_(Ryan clears his throat and looks directly at the camera.)_

_(TH) _Ryan: As I'm sure you've probably already figured out-- Pam and I are... _(he glances over at her and they give each other little, nervous smiles before he turns back to the camera)_ um... we are dating.

_(Ryan suddenly breaks out into wide-mouthed grin, and looks down, trying but failing to hide it from the camera. Pam goes on for him.)_

_(TH)_Pam: Yeah, we've been dating for about a month now. It's been going really well. _(She smiles at the camera and turns back to Ryan, grinning. He's grinning back at her.)_

_(TH)_Ryan: Yeah, we haven't told anyone in the office yet... for... obvious reasons. _(he suddenly looks a little upset)_ Kelly hasn't really made anything any easier. I already told you I've tried breaking up with her over a dozen times, but she wasn't getting the message.

_(TH)_Pam_ (shaking her head)_: No, I think she got the message. She just chose to handle it like an emotionally-stunted fourteen year old.

_(TH)_Ryan _(doubtfully)_: I don't think that's it.

_(TH)_Pam _(shrugging)_: Can you think of any other way Kelly would handle a situation?

_(Ryan looks at Pam, then at the camera. He nods and shrugs, as if saying 'She's got a point'. Pam nods gravely at the camera, silently indicating she _was_ right. They both suddenly split into identical, shy smiles.)_

_(TH)_Ryan _(looking over at Pam)_: Still... I think the reason why I wanted to break things off with her were pretty obvious.

_(Pam noticeably blushes and looks down. Ryan merely grins at the camera once again.)_

***

_(Karen walks past Jim at his desk and towards her own. Jim is watching her, obviously thinking. When she sits down, he taps a knuckle against his own desk and slowly stands up, walking towards her.)_

Jim _(leaning against Karen's desk)_: Hey.

Karen _(smiling up at him)_: Hey.

Jim: So how was your lunch with Pam?

Karen: It was so much fun! We went to that seafood place, uh what's it called...? _(she snaps her fingers, trying to remember)... _Coopers! That's it. We went to Coopers and chatted about life... and our boyfriends. _(she gives Jim an impish smile, but Jim doesn't return it)_

Jim _(tenatively)_: So she talked to you about her boyfriend? I heard it was someone in the office...

Karen: Yeah... _(perking up suddenly) _Oh my God! You would _not_ believe who it is!

Jim _(trying to hide his excitement)_: Yeah? Who?

_(Karen opens her mouth to say when they are interrupted by Michael calling everyone to attention.)_

Michael: Can I have everyone's attention, please?

_(Karen puts a finger to her lips and turns toward Michael, and so does a mutinous-looking Jim. Michael is smiling proudly at Dwight, who's sitting obediantly at his desk and looking like his normal stoic, moon-faced self.)_

Michael: Everybody, I would just like to mention the fact that Dwight is better than all of you. _(he pauses, nodding wisely, not noticing everyone is staring in disbelief)_

Jim _(annoyed)_: Really? That's all you came out here to tell us?

Michael: No, James, that is not all I came out here to tell you... I also have some exciting news that Movie Monday will be reinstated!

_(dead silence, followed by chattering)_

Stanley: How is that even relevant?

Angela: We never even said we wanted Movie Monday back.

Andy: When did it cancel in the first place?

Creed: Wait, isn't it Friday?

Kelly: No it's Tuesday. I know that 'cause Hell's Kitchen is on tonight.

Meredith: Ugh, I _hate_ that show.

Phyllis: Hold on, I thought that it was cancelled because of it being inappropriate.

Kelly: Nah, they bleep out everything bad Chef Ramsay says, so its safe.

Michael _(interrupting)_: Everyone, shut up!! I'm reinstating Movie Monday _because_ _of _Dwight being better than all of you! _(he looks around, obviously looking to see if that clarified things)_

Andy: Yeah, I still don't get it.

Oscar: And that's really insulting, Michael.

Michael _(frustrated)_: Look, Dwight, here, has stuck to watching my TV show when you all turned your backs to me and I'm reinstating an improptu Movie _Tuesday_ to celebrate his comradeship!

Stanley _(dubiously)_: You cannot be serious.

Michael: Yes, Stanley, I am very serious. Completely. I expect all of you to be in the conference room by four p.m. sharp. Thank you.

Angela: But Michael...

Michael _(with finality)_: Thank you!!

_(He turns and walks back into the conference room. Dwight looks about ready to break down crying. Jim shakes his head and turns toward Karen again, but she's already immersed in a conversation with Phyllis, both obviously upset for wasting their time on such trivial things. Jim merely sighs, stands up, and walks toward his own desk.)_

_**End Scene 8**_

* * *

_(TH- hallway)_Dwight: No, I didn't watch any episodes of Michael's TV show, nor will I ever. I only made it halfway through the pilot, then I had to go back to work. I have obligations at this company, therefore it is my duty to uphold them... _(pauses for a few seconds)_ Michael can't punish me if I phrase it like that, can he?

_(Dwight and Jim are both pacing the break room.)_

Dwight: Jim, what am I supposed to do about this whole CSI situation?

Jim _(anxiously)_: Dwight, I kinda have my own problems right now. _(he sits down in a chair and buries his head in his hands)_ Who could Pam's boyfriend be?

Dwight: – because Michael is about ready to honor me because of watching a show I really didn't watch!

Jim: – because she's dating someone from this office, and yet I still have no idea who!

Dwight: I guess I can just keep my mouth shut and keep researching online...

Jim: It's either Kevin, Michael, Ryan, Creed, Oscar, Stanley, Andy, or Toby... but each one is less likely than the last.

Dwight: … but Michael could still be reading our emails, which means he may or may not have access to our website histories...

Jim: She's hated Kevin for as long I can remember... _(suddenly, to Dwight)_ did Michael say anything to you about him dating Pam?

Dwight _(distractedly)_: No he didn't. He didn't write anything in his diary either.

_(He starts pacing again, and Jim just looks at him weirdly.)_

Dwight: I guess I just have to suffer through today and wait till this whole CSI fad blows over...

Jim: Who the hell else in this office would Pam date?

_(Dwight suddenly spins around and glares at Jim.)_

Dwight: Okay, if you want to know so badly, go ask her! Quit whining to me about it! You were her best friend for over three years: you shouldn't feel afraid to go up to her and ask a stupid little question. If you can't even do that, then you're more pathetic than I thought...

_(Storms out, leaving Jim in the break room looking after him, anger and sadness etched on his face. He finally tears his eyes away from the door and looks down.)_

_***_

_(Everyone is gathered in the conference room, ready for Movie Tuesday.)_

Michael: Okay everybody, ready for Movie Tuesday?!

_(incoherent grumbles)_

Michael: I can't heeeeear yooooou!

_(dead silence)_

Michael _(happily)_: Okay, okay I get it. Overstaying my... stay. Now, the feature tonight is CSI, obviously...

_(some noises of protest from certain coworkers)_

Michael: ..._But _with a little twist! We will be watching the show from wherever Dwight left off, and try to figure out what's been happening. Sound fun?

_(Camera suddenly moves from Michael to Dwight, who's sitting frozen in his seat, terrified. He knows he only left off halfway through the pilot.)_

Michael: Ready...? _(his index finger hovers over the play button on the remote)_

Dwight: No, Michael...!

_(Michael hits play. The entire office watches the show play for about ten seconds. Dwight just looks down the whole time before Michael pauses it. The whole room is eerie silent)_

Michael _(deadly quiet)_: Dwight, this is the pilot.

_(Dwight doesn't say anything.)_

Michael: You didn't watch any of the show, did you?

_(still silent)_

Michael: So what do you have to say for yourself?

Dwight _(pleadingly)_: You're like the father I've never had, Michael.

_(Michael purses his lips and looks down at his feet, trying to quell his anger)_

Michael: Everyone out of the room except Dwight.

_(Everybody practically dives out of the room while Michael and Dwight are left alone in the dark, conference room)_

_***_

_(Pam is getting resettled at her desk when Jim suddenly walks up. He takes a few jelly beans out of the case and rests his elbows on her desk. Pam looks up at him, surprised at seeing him use his old habits.)_

Pam: Hey

Jim: Hey, what's up?

Pam: Nothing much. Just waiting for the clock to strike five.

Jim _(smirking)_: You should teach a time management course on the weekends.

_(Pam giggles, and Jim smirks.)_

Jim _(taking a deep breath)_: So how was your lunch with Karen today?

Pam _(lighting up)_: Oh my God, we had a blast! It was great, really.

Jim _(smiling sincerely)_: Well, I'm glad... you deserve to be happy, Beesly.

_(Pam blushes and looks away, uncomfortable. It is awkward for a minute before Jim breaks it)_

Jim: Well... yeah, I know Karen had fun too...

Pam _(smiling)_: Yeah?

Jim _(nodding)_: Yep. _(he coughs a little) _She mentioned... that, um... _(Pam is looking up at him, confused) _that you... well, you told her who... your boyfriend is...

_(Pam suddenly grows pale, and her smile drops. She just looks at Jim)_

Pam: Oh

Jim: Yeah. And, I know you might not want to tell me... cause, well... yeah. _(they are both very uncomfortable now) _And I totally understand why you wouldn't want me to find out... but Pam, do you mind if I ask...?

Pam _(quietly)_: Yeah.

Jim _(sadly)_: Oh.

Pam _(quickly)_: No, I mean no! _(Jim looks at her, confused)_ I meant 'Yeah I understand.' No, I don't mind telling you... _(she bites her bottom lip)_

_(Jim just looks down at her, holding his breath. Pam looks down at her keyboard, sighing deeply.)_

Pam _(quietly; barely distinguishable)_: It's Ryan.

_(Jim heard her loud and clear. He looks at her, in shock, as Pam looks straight into his eyes. He's just silent for a few seconds before he turns to leave.)_

Jim: Okay

_(Pam watches him walk away, a sad look in her eyes.)_

_(TH)_Pam: Today didn't exactly turn out exactly how I wanted, but that's okay. When you work here, you gotta learn how to roll with the punches. You have to learn how to deal with your idiot boss and his creepy sidekick duking it out about CSI in the conference room all day. Also telling your ex-best friend you're dating someone else in the office. And also dealing with frustrated and overstressed coworkers. _(she looks lost in thought for a second or two) _Anyone else would've called this a catastrophe of epic proportions... but here it's just an average Tuesday.

_(Jim is walking out of the kitchen with a coffee in his hand, but stops dead in his tracks. Pam is by Ryan, who's at his desk, and are chatting. They both look rather giggly. Jim merely turns around and walks back into the kitchen.)_

_**End Scene 9**_

* * *

**Closing**

_(Camera pans in through conference room window to see Michael yelling something to the floor. Camera moves forward to see Dwight down there, doing sloppy pushups. Michael tries putting his foot on his lower back to improve his form, issuing high shrieks of pain to come from Dwight. Everyone is looking at them from their desks with odd, terrified expressions on their faces.)_

_(VO)_Michael: I really did try to forgive Dwight for lying to my face about watching my CSI show, but turns out I am not very good at forgiving people there sins. So I have decided to punish Dwight along with his other punishment for going behind my back with Jan. _(he nods) _I'm making him do 60 pushups then watch me eat a piece of chocolate cake.

***

_(Ryan and Pam are by her desk and Jim and Karen are by his, all four ready to leave for the day. Jim glances over at the other couple.)_

Jim _(to Karen_): I'll meet you in the car, kay?

_(Karen nods and heads out the door, giving a giddy wave in the direction of the happy couple by reception. Both say goodbye, smiling back. Jim walks up to the both of them.)_

Jim: Hey, Ryan. Could I have a word?

Ryan _(surprised)_: Sure. _(turning to Pam)_ I'll see you tomorrow, all right?

_(Pam nods, and gives him a quick kiss on the lips. She ignores Jim's pained expression and walks out the door after Karen. Ryan turns to Jim, his face still noticeably happy.)_

Ryan: What's up man?

_(Jim just stares at the door for a second before turning to the much shorter man before him. He takes a deep breath.)_

Jim: Just... don't hurt her, okay?

_(There's a quiet desperation in his voice, and Ryan raises his eyebrows.)_

Ryan: I won't.

_(Jim nods before heading towards the door himself. Ryan just stands there for a moment before glancing at the camera, pressing his lips together, and slowly turning around and walking out last.)_

_**The End**_

**A/N: So, what do you think? Should I do a CSI Scranton 2?? Review pretty-please!!:)**


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